Monday, September 21, 2009

bummer.

It is sad to be left out. Thats how i have always felt. Ever since I was young. I never felt part of a group. Ive always wanted that. to just be a person that everyone calls. I feel like i lost greg and anne as my best friends. They hang out with eachother everynight with eddie and drew. and thats cool and all but i want to be there. i want to be a part of those roomies. I feel as if they could care less that im not there. I guess its this lonliness is getting to me. i had a long convo with sammy today. she feels how i do because her and eddie use to be besties but she at least has alex. i have no one. i feel so desperate begging people to hang out with me, makes me so sad i want to cry. I cant wait for Chris to be here because he will actually want to be with me. I want to feel wanted again. I hate that what I had before, is gone. and forgotten. and those people dont care. greg says that i dont know what im talking about. that we hang out a lot. i wish i could feel that way. i feel bad i cant see what he sees. it's just i guess i expect so much and get barely anything. :[
Anne greg drew and eddie....best friends now. not me. :[ they are planning on having a group costume for halloween....not with me. they go on bike rides together. i sit here alone. ok i dont wanna depress myself so night.

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